Lissa Rankin – Looking at Vaginas in a Positive Light

Janet and I were so excited when our copy of Lissa Rankin’s What’s Up Down There? came in.  “Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend” – awesome, right!?  Things like “What is a normal size for a clitoris?”; “If I’ve had a hysterectomy, will it affect my orgasm?” and “My crotch sweats and soaks my pants. What can I do about it?”  Dr. Rankin is an inspiring woman who has dedicated her work and life to supporting women to feel good about themselves.  Her website Owning Pink is home to 30-some bloggers and a community of more than 1,200 members.  She speaks openly, frankly and positively about women’s sexuality.  We were pretty surprised when we got the book and realized it mentions sexually transmitted infections (STIs) only briefly and in passing.  So, Janet and I did what we do best (or at least, what we enjoy the most) and starting talking about why this might be.

We think we get what Lissa’s all about when it comes to sex.  She wants women to feel healthy and confident and GOOD about ourselves – to stop worrying about whether we’re “normal”.  We really appreciate this; it’s one of the things that drew us to this online community in the first place.  But, we have some concerns.  Don’t get me wrong, we don’t actually think everybody should go around talking humourlessly about sex and STIs all the time like we do …  Ever tried to crack a sex joke with me?  Chances are I’ll completely miss the fact that it’s a joke and respond to what I perceive as an educational opportunity: “Well, no dipping your penis in Coca-Cola will not prevent pregnancy or STIs; it’s probably best to use a condom”.

Lissa and the Owning Pink crowd want to keep it positive.  There is so much fear-mongering and negativity about sex, especially in the more conservative corners of the continent.  They want to counter this, and that’s awesome.  Here’s where it doesn’t quite work for us though – a good portion of women are living with STIs that may or may not cause itching, burning, discharge or sores.  So, if you’re going to pick up an affirming book that addresses questions about vaginas and has chapters called “Discharge and Itching” and “How Coochies Smell and Taste”, you might expect it to have some space for a vagina that’s living with Herpes or Chlamydia or HIV.  If you’re reading a book that only tells you “oh, everybody’s different, that’s what a perfectly healthy vagina looks like”, then where does a less-than-perfectly-healthy vagina find a place for itself?

Normalizing sex and women’s sexuality is so important, and Lissa Rankin is contributing to this cause.  An important part of normalizing sexuality though, is reducing stigma around STIs so that women are not afraid to ask the right questions and get the right information to make educated decisions and feel empowered about sex.  We also need to normalize STI testing, education and discussion.  Women from all walks of life are living with STIs, and these women deserve to feel healthy and positive about their sexuality too.

Lissa, we admire your work and your dedication to empowering women and helping us realize our full potential.  What would be awesome is if you could remind women about the importance of getting tested and practicing safer sex.

- Miriam

This was posted on Friday, January 28th, 2011 at 10:02 am and is filed under Body Health, Education & Resources, HIV stigma, Networking, sexual health . Feel free to respond, or trackback. Read our comments policy.

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